Bold Coaching For The Day: 10 Facts Every Christian Woman Should Know
1. Everyone has issues they have to work through. Especially the leaders who seem successful.
2. When God tells you he loves and accepts you despite how you’re performing, believe him. It’s true.
3. Sometimes we all melt down. And when we do, it’s not pretty. So, avoid anyone with a phone who can record it.
4. For every woman unhappy with where her marriage is there is a woman who just wishes she was married.
5. You should definitely see yourself as an overcomer. Jesus finished strong and you’re in HIM.
6. Don’t expect men to give you permission to lead. Do it and your results will be your podium.
7. It’s okay to get upset and want to take action. Just be willing to go through the spiritual warfare to get to the other side.
8. We all have that one friend who champions us. Block time for her weekly, she will be a sword at your side.
9. You should have a vision. Not a hope. It’s not your husbands job to create it for you. Do the work yourself.
10. You’re a woman. Your born to birth life and stronger than you think. It doesn’t matter how you feel or whether you can see it right now. It’s WHO YOU ARE DNA wise.
One of the common characteristics of those who grew up in shame-based, addiction based or simply fear based homes is a lack of ability to hear God speak personally to them when they don’t feel close to God. The truth is Christ spoke to people in the midst of their sin and had conversations with them regardless of their ethnicity, gender or religious affiliation.
This mindset of needing to be perfect before God speaks or directs your life generally comes from a lack of spiritual parenting. The deep abandonment, loneliness and isolation individuals feel who have had to raise themselves emotionally or spiritually. You see it’s your biblical inheritance and identity to feel deeply loved, guarded, valued and guided by your Dad. I majored in Criminology and I can tell you we had many discussions on how fatherless homes impact the prison system.
When you grow up having to pioneer life yourself, you struggle deeply with needing affirmation and the truth is nothing is ever quite good enough to please you performance wise. You’re always second guessing yourself and other people’s motivations. Without healing and coaching, this carries into poverty mentalities and self- sabotaging behaviors. Why? Because you’re always striving to perform for your Father and get that need met that only he can fill. Today I want to give you 8 questions you can take to God so that you begin to receive the healing you need and be settled in his will for your life.
You have to be able to practice going to God when you feel unworthy and writing down into a journal what you think you hear back from him. This helps you solidify your identity in the shed blood of Christ rather than in your ability to get things right!
1. Father, do I still feel like I am trying to be a “Good Christian”?
If so, memorize the scripture I did, Hebrews 4; 4-7. But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!” So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God.
Every time you worry you messed up or are jealous of other’s people’s success, understand this is coming from your lack of fathering. It’s normal. You just need to repent of striving for that approval and quiet your heart by speaking the word to it. This is spiritual warfare to keep you in a place where you keep trying rather than trusting. Use the word as balm over the loneliness you feel. If you are in Christ, you are accepted and you have received an A if you are attempting to grow and learn from your mistakes. There is no B, C, D, F. All your failures will be used by God to glorify him if you stay humble and teachable. Trust me on that one!
2. Will you set me free from people-pleasing?
This question kills the fear of man in your life and brings you to the point where you stop performing for Jesus and people. This means you’re ready to go to him daily, read the word, ask him about specific direction and how you are to proceed. Your going to obey what your heavenly father says to you from the word of God and what you hear in prayer. This question will bring you to the place where people pleasing will end and you will learn how to move forward into the will of God on what people confirm to you that God has first spoken to you. It may mean you drop out of activities that look very pious and you spend time focusing on the things that he is revealing to you to focus on. This is one of the most life changing questions to ask your Father. Trust when you ask, he is going to speak and write down what you feel like he says to you. You’re going to obey God fully now.
3. Will you place in the body of Christ as you see fit? I am prepared to build intimate relationships that can help me build my leadership.
It’s hard to push past the jealousy you feel when you see other people thriving and you’re on survival mode. Again, this is normal for what you’ve been through but you have to choose to not withdraw out of fellowship when you feel lack or that you’re not performing well. If not, then you’re opting for a mask and that will just delay you being able to hear the will of God for your life. Be honest with where you’re at with people and ask for feedback into area’s of your life, parenting and leadership that you want to get better at. No one expects you to know everything if you have grown up fatherless so don’t put that on yourself. Find a church and believers that you can be real with. If you are local to Atlanta, here is our church and you can come sit with Jay and I at the 11 am service.
4. Father, in this season, WHO do you want me to focus on to help them build success?
This is again is another one of the questions that will fast track you OUT OF being a prodigal son. People who are fatherless are marked by isolation due to their overwhelm or it’s all about their own success. They won’t take time to give anyone else a step up and resent those who are given grace. This is again because everything is a competition to them. When you are a true son or daughter your life is measured by who you help feel significant around you. This goes for your family, the bag boy at the grocery store and those who are less fortunate than you. Commit to mentoring someone for a year and watch how God opens doors for you supernaturally.
5. Father, how would you like me to prepare for the promotion you want to bring me?
God is a good Father and desires to bring you good things. He gives to everyone various talents and gifts to help them enjoy life and serve others. If he has given you a desire to learn, get as much education as you can. If you love to work with your hands and be outside, then go get certified in welding, mechanical work or whatever technical trade that will allow you to be the best you can. If you need an identity boost, join the military. In the family of God, there is always a preparation that goes before authority. There is a pace to preparation, ask God to help you enjoy every season you’re in without feeling like you’re not going fast enough or doing a good enough job but do prepare and don’t sabotage yourself by saying you don’t have the resources. Decide what you need to be successful and figure out how to fund it.
6. Father, am I processing my pain by medicating with food, drugs, or any other addiction that is creating a barrier between you and I?
When you grow up in a Fatherless or fear based home, it takes training to learn how to go to God instead of the idolatry that has comforted you. If you keep medicating the ache in your heart, then God cannot heal you. Again, there is no condemnation in Christ Jesus but God wants better for you. Learning how to process pain correctly is one of the first things we teach new clients who come into our programs as it gives you an ability to move successfully through spiritual warfare. If you need help with that, the Bold Identity program will help you.
7. Father, am I looking for “success” or “significance”?
This sometimes is hard to discern but here’s my take on it. If you are willing to compromise your personal convictions and the spiritual and emotional health of those around you, then you are striving for success. When we are married, you need your spouse to help you gauge the temperature of your family. If you are single, this is where your closest spiritual friends are going to help you navigate this. I know in my life, I have always had a restlessness about me to live a “bigger and deeper life”. I have no problem saying that. However, the older I have gotten, the more I go to the Lord in prayer to bring to pass what I see internally. I then try and prepare at a comfortable pace for where I believe will help me be able to steward the next level of influence. I can honestly say, you can only feel significant from living an un-compromised life before God and doing it with people beside you that you love.
8. Father, do I feel minimized when those around me gain success or want to launch off of what they learned from me?
Individuals who are fatherless always have to be in control. They take it personally when someone leaves their church or organization to lead their own stuff. Most of the time, this is because they have built success around their charisma and loss created insecurity. When we truly have the heart of a father or mother, we rejoice that we have invested well enough that our employees, children or clients can leave us to grow their own vision. We state like the apostle Paul did, I know how to be blessed and I know how to be in lack. It’s all about what the father desires and what will glorify him in a greater way.
Again, just want to encourage you to keep pressing through the muck that clouds your leadership. God has an incredible things for you planned and wants to use YOU to influence others for his kingdom. The discouragement often times is just spiritual warfare to wear us down and get us to quit. Don’t. I am praying for you and we are here to help you process through into success!
We all have a desire for community. In Psalm 68, it says, God places the solitary in families and gives the desolate a home in which to dwell! So, it’s important to God that we are surrounded by support and we don’t become isolated. However, one of the things I see happen frequently are people who struggle with a lack of affirmation so deeply that they sabotage their own success relationally.
Understand that raising your leadership means you have to make a commitment to not sabotage yourself with others in the midst of spiritual warfare. Living a powerful life means you will have to have strong boundaries and not come under the fear of man.
Here are 10 Ways to stop sabotaging your success:
Be willing to let go of individuals in your life that talk a lot about what they are going to do but never execute. Instead pray and ask God to help YOU become identity-wise someone who makes a goal and keeps it. Keep hanging around people who will ask you if you followed through on what you said you wanted to do and point out to you if you’re making excuses. This will ensure you begin to attract more significant people into your life.
Guard your peace. This is probably one of the number one things that can make or break your success. The anointing and power of God rests on those who are committed to be peace-makers. This translates first and foremost into learning how to keep yourself in peace and guard others peace. Feel valuable enough to set boundaries around your heart, your time and keep people out of your personal space and teams who steal or disrupt it. In the early church, people were kicked out quickly if they were quarrelsome because the power of unity was so crucial to the Holy Spirit being present and the church multiplying!
Be careful about sharing frustrating information that projects you as a complainer rather than a problem solver. Now, I want to be clear about this. When you are not feeling successful, be strategic about talking about where you are falling short. DO NOT talk about anything that causes you to feel pain with anyone who cannot solve it. That should eliminate 98% of the people around you. There is nothing that will sabotage your success than appearing victimized. You cannot be powerful and pitiful at the same time. This isn’t about hiding. It’s about thinking before you open your mouth. If you have to take time in prayer and ask God for a solution, do that but don’t talk about it in public. Solve it with someone who has the training to help you overcome it.
When there is conflict, look for ways to take ownership of the part you played. This creates more humility and transparency for everyone involved. It gives everyone permission to fail and not have to be perfect and then you can focused on solving the problem rather than blaming. Shift blaming usually happens with immature or insecure leadership.
Don’t stuff your emotions or be passive-aggressive. Usually this comes from people in your life that modeled this to you. You will build success fast if you will just communicate when you are frustrated at a lower level or ask for clarification to avoid the matter becoming complicated. If you don’t feel heard, communicate that also and then set a boundary if neccessary. Passive-aggressiveness is actually a form of control and is the tool of fearful people.
Focus on building long-term healthy relationships and not having to be right. Fast track to control freak island if you have to be 100% right about everything or you’re going to cut someone off relationally. As best as you can, love people even through the bad decisions they make and keep the door open for communication. Don’t be a bridge burner, it eats wealth.
When other people succeed, congratulate them and internally note if you feel jealousy. If so, do the work in order to match the blessing they received. God is no respecter of person’s and fruit follows stewardship. Plant good fruit and you too will grow a beautiful vineyard!
Pray about solving a problem but then begin to take action. You do not wait and wait for the perfect plan to be downloaded to you. You begin to execute on different solutions until you find the one that works for you. Waiting on God is done in prayer and it’s an action that leads to execution. Don’t be religious and tell everyone you’re “Waiting on the Lord”. Tell them you just prayed about it this morning and you will be executing by the end of the week.
Avoid thinking in catastrophic terms and instead think what’s the best thing that could happen. Faith will always compel you to toward an expected GOOD END. Fear will have you rehearsing everything that could go wrong.
Don’t wait for the perfect time to execute on your vision. It will never be the perfect time, or will you have best resources. Delay is just a tactic of the enemy to sabotage your faith and focus. Better a good plan executed violently today, than a perfect plan tomorrow. Gen. George Patton!
When you build a new identity and overcome the obstacles that have left other’s feeling victimized, you are going to create enormous tension for those around you. It will cause them to have to go deeper with you and into more success or detach from you because they feel threatened. This can happen from a lack of Lordship or honestly, a lack of work ethic. The bottom line is the fear of man will sabotage every bit of leadership on your life. Fear God, serve people.
Stop sabotaging your success by taking the time to build a solid leadership model. Need help with that? Check out the Bold Identity program and team. This is where we do a lot of this mindset training and can help you process through the steps with a positive and faith filled community bent on getting you results!
Find out how to fight off discouragement and dream death quickly. When you a growing a Christian coaching business out of your own resurrection story, you’re going to experience a whole different level of spiritual warfare than a regular Christian coach is going to get. It’s also going to be challenging to learn what you need to know to market your own brand.
And I think learning how to fight off discouragement is difficult to discern because people assume running a Christian coaching business rather than a “ministry” is less spiritual warfare. WRONG! So today, I want to help those of you who are committed to using your own obstacles to encourage others and show you how I have recovered from discouragement and dream death in a month’s time over and over again.
Here’s the good news: God is not afraid of your drama and he ALWAYS has a plan for your deepest heart traumas. We are human and we tend to think that our pain is unique and because of it feel very isolated, feeling like no one can understand the depth of our anguish and rejection. The truth is this is where walking by faith and not by HOW YOU FEEL can be a launch pad for the next season of influence you are getting ready to step into.
First, state the time line you will be healed. This causes you to have an expected end, give yourself time to grieve properly but invite the supernatural in to do it quickly.
This is not attempting to control God, it’s giving yourself a goal in the darkness that can give you hope. In addition, you cannot lead effectively if you are burned out so it’s important that you just admit this quickly and you RAISE your level of self care without guilt. When I realize I am at my breaking point and this for me (after being through it dozens of time) is what I describe as the black hole. I call my two closest friends and tell them I need a serious prayer covering. (Husband already knows and is praying) I confess I am struggling with oppression and I ask them to take a couple days and lift me up in a specific way as a shield around me. I believe in the power of prayer and have seen it completely transform my life and others. You must feel safe enough with people to let them know you are hurting. I will also ask the elders of my church to pray with me in agreement for the oppression to lift. When you are hurting it’s no time to be John or Jane Wayne. I ask people to agree with me that within 1 month I will experience a miracle. EXPECT BREAKTHROUGH and the power of agreement is extremely powerful. It raises your faith.
Second, you get angry at repeated cycles of failure so get ready to set stronger boundaries because there is no going back.
I got one scripture for you. “For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places” Ephesians 6:12
You’re not mad at the people in your life. Your mad at the demonic interference behind their decisions. As you coach and speak, you’re going to hit every stronghold that has been in your clients lives, your personal leadership, marriage and your family as you disciple people for Christ. All the gaps are going to be exposed. Sometimes it takes repeated cycles of failure in order to take ground that has been intergenerational. The enemy knows just where to attack you and what you’re weakest link is. You will have to set very clear boundaries that you don’t back up from. This is when you’re going to get honest with yourself and choose to yield to the purging work of the Holy Spirit. You will learn how to raise your leadership level and channel the pain into productive actions. Why? Because goodness and mercy are going to follow you right after you walk through the valley of the shadow of death if you don’t quit or run. (And you’re not alone though it may feel like you are).
The third cause of discouragement is impatience and this is why so many people quit on their dreams.
When you pioneer spiritually before people, you see within yourself the potential and the place where God wants to take your clients and the people you love. You can’t stand to see them sabotage their own destiny and delay the purposes of God on their life. You feel like you had to make a mistake believing God for something this large. Looking at the circumstances, there’s no way in this lifetime these people are going to get results. You feel this desperate lunge for a quicker pace and you watch the life ring that could save them float away from them. It’s a sickening feeling but guess what? Now, God can scoop them up because you have planted and it’s time for God to do his part resurrecting now. God has a pace. Let go and let him take the wheel. He knows when to speed up and when to bring things to a screeching halt. Go back to your vision board and pray specifically over it.
Fourth, discouragement produces an odor that attracts people who have been victimized.
This is why when you are weak, you must be wise about who you share your discouragement with. People who have not experienced the resurrection power of Christ are going to love to console you and wallow with you. When I have been at my weakest, only a fist full of people know. I don’t talk about the pain as the more you tell the story, the more you imprint yourself emotionally with pain. Instead I will get on the treadmill for one hour and listen to worship music. Or I will tackle a huge physical task like painting the outside of my house by myself while I listen to worship music. The husband thinks this is much cheaper for us than me going to the Caribbean and he get’s his projects done. Worship gives you a supernatural ability to heal and keeps your heart tender so you can make good decisions in the pain. One of my favorite albums is United by Hillsong Worship. It opens my heart and helps me cry out the pain. Crying is one of the healthiest things you can do when you’re hurting. Sob like a baby. It’s great for your soul and causes you to go deeper with Christ. He’s going to bottle up all those tears for you for the showers of blessings that are headed your way when he shows up with his resurrection power.
Fifth, you have a desire to ditch your coaching and your ministry. I always want to bail and quit on those around me.
I want to leave. As in pack a bag and walk right out the door to a beach with a cabana boy serving me fruity drinks with umbrella’s in them. All the scriptures on covenant I know were meant for someone else not me. Now, I’m going to give you permission to take yourself out to dinner and eat chocolate. Now, stay away from the fruity drinks just because the enemy wants nothing more than to create a Margarita idol for you to take away your pain. Ask me how I know this:) I’m giving away my top secrets here…one is 5HTP. When I lose my mind, my own mother asks me…”Becky, are you taking the 5Htp?
Why? Because 100mg of this for a week and I have a reasoning mind again. The first thing that leaves me with stress is sleep and my serotonin crashes. This product helps you stable out in about 2 to 3 weeks if you are exercising along with it. Now anything over 100mg is going to make you dream WAY TO INTENSE. Also, 3 weeks on and then go off for a week. You don’t want to build up a resistance to it. Do not take this if you are on other medications for depression and OBVIOUSLY I am not a doctor so use your brain and if you’re not sure about whether this is right for you, talk to your doctor.
Resist the devil and his discouragement. Let me pray in agreement with you right now that a spirit of discouragement is going to lift off of you and you are going to receive more faith for the resurrection power of what you are standing for to anoint your head in the presence of your enemies. Watch and receive here.
Today we are going to talk about a poverty spirit and how to overcome it quickly. I am going to say this in love because I had to get free from this too. This mindset comes from not understanding your value and how hard you have to work to push into higher realms of authority.
I am reaching out my hand on your hand, giving you a loving but challenging look and want you to receive this in the love it is spoken. I am not talking down to you. I am attempting to lift you up to the high places where you belong.
Someone who has a poverty spirit and mindset wants to lead a more significant life.
They just don’t want to match that desire (or won’t) with work.
Now, some of you were like DANG GIRL THAT WAS HARSH. I just wish someone would have taken the time to put their arm around me like I am doing with you and tell you this:
You Becky (insert your name) are much more capable and powerful than you know. Take authority over this poverty spirit that wants you to think you are limited and put your butt into gear because you are called to a much higher level of leadership than you are currently operating on.
( ), You have heard God correctly to build the vision you have.
( ), I applaud your desire for more and that you’re tired of hanging around people who complain about the results they are getting and have a low work ethic. You have one life to live and you will stand accountable to God for what you do so I love the fact you fear God more than your circumstances.
I expect you, ( ) to achieve something in life that is going to change people inter-generationally and that you’re going to stop looking back and letting the devil beat you up with condemnation. Face forward, the past is gone.
I want you to trust yourself to pursue what you believe will help you grow and do whatever it takes, including babysitting, mowing lawns, cleaning toilets, hosting car washes and baking pies to raise the money. Whatever you gift you currently have, God is waiting for you to put it into play to finance your next step. Don’t ever complain to me again that you don’t have the resources to fund what God is calling you to.
Lastly, Becky ( ). I believe in you. I consider it a privilege to be the person who is delivering this word of God to you. God corrects those he loves. Those who have POTENTIAL in the kingdom.
Now, I expect you from this point on to be the 90 fold seed. Call me in 3 days and let me know what kind of miracle the Father did for his favorite daughter.
Loving you with truth. Loving you with a word of God for you because today, YOU are the favorite son or daughter. Now get to work and let me know if this helped you!!!
P.S. If you don’t have anyone TRAINING you on how to break this mindset over you life, then I want to encourage you to join the BOLD IDENTITY Team. You are given content specifically to grow your leadership and I meet with this team LIVE once a week to deal with this at a root level. It is affordable for EVERYONE!
Websites for life coaches should be compelling from an identity stand-point so that you can set yourself apart from everyone else. Today, I am going to walk you through the basic branding components that you will want on your site front page in order to grow and have people read further in. I also have another blog, about how to begin to communicate your identity on your business page for Facebook once you get your first site set up. Facebook is a great way to drive traffic to your site. If you have a friend that wants to avoid the “new age” business coaching then we would love to serve them.
It’s not hard to create a successful, authentic and compelling identity on your site. You will spend money in the beginning but if you’re serious about launching a business, websites for life coaches are an expense you don’t want to skimp on. You can get started by following these 10 simple steps.
1. If at all possible use your real name as your website domain and have it hosted by Bluehost.
Your name IS your identity. This is the quickest way to set yourself apart quickly. I was not able to do this because someone had already used my name. Expect God to grow your influence and people will be able to find you easier. It’s the most simple and SEO friendly way to build your reputation as an expert and brand without effort. Check and see if you name is available as a domain name with Bluehost and you can also get them to host the website. This is specifically why I recommend them.
First, the president of the company who launched Bluehost, Matt Heaton, didn’t want any porno on the servers so he made it a policy that is still intact. You won’t have to worry about investing money in a company that subsidizes sites that erode family values.
Second, they are pretty reliable and cost effective in my opinion. I have been with Bluehost for about three or four years now and they have had about one or two downed servers a year for about 5 or 6 hours. The other two companies I was with were down a lot more than this.
Third, the customer service is pretty good. The wait time is generally not too bad on a Wed. or Saturday and they will help you solve multiple problems without making you call back for every single issue. When they have made a mistake, they apologize and have upgraded me. I ask a lot of questions so I am not the easy hosting client:). If you want to use me as a referral here is the link (and I thank you ahead, by affiliate name is SUCCESSnotsabotage)
2. Get a template that is specifically created to help you grow your influence and is going to equip you to stretch your “tent pegs” when you’re ready.
I LOVE (Heart, heart, heart) Michael Hyatt’s theme, GetNoticed. It has a super-easy back end to work with with video plugins, survey’s, books, quote blocks, tweet this, Holy Cow. It was made for those who want to get out there and are serious about growing their platform. As in your now ready to move off of hobby mode. Michael has a support group he does for under $50.00 a month twice a year and here is something even more beautiful…brace yourself….you can buy training on how to actually use the Get Noticed theme broken down into small video’s of about 3 minutes each. A young whipper snapper named John Meese created a “How to training” on how to use Michaels theme and I nearly wept when I found it. And of course I bought it immediately and signed up as an affiliate because I was so impressed. The support tickets are answered in about nano seconds.
3. Work with only three primary colors on your website. Anything more will be way to busy and distract people from your content.
4. Hire someone to take professional pictures of you for your site. Clear, crisp, WOW pictures.
This makes such a difference. This is one of the first gaps I solve when I work with private clients. A 5 year old picture of you is not indicating to your clients that you are growing. You are going to need about 25 to 50 pictures all in different poses. Sit, stand, look excited to be coaching (Because you are!), sit in a chair coaching someone who is getting powerful breakthrough, get pictures of you at your desk with your headset on, you got the idea. Buy a new outfit if you need to. I got pictures in my favorite jacket and jeans I speak in, a dress and a fitness outfit. I used them for a whole year for making graphics on here with Canva. For $1.00 you can upload these and use them for your Facebook advertising. Your going to spend about $300.00 to $1,000.00 on a photographer but your going to make THOUSANDS from the programs you will see because you didn’t cheap yourself out. Your clients assume that if you have a nice site, you have grown your business successfully. Please don’t hire your cousin Johnny unless he takes SMOKING HOT PICTURES.
5. Start working on a training you can use to collect emails and start building your list.
I suggest Aweber as their system is pretty easy and every time you want to create a new list, you can just use a drop down menu. Here’s the first thing I would suggest if you want to create a BAM for your site. Think in context of SPECIFIC RESULTS for your client. Your going to place it at the very top for your main opt in. Once you start doing marketing, you can use your secondary opt in on the top right side bar.
If you’re completely overwhelmed on where to start as you are new…think about pulling out pieces of your testimony. Specifically, where are the places that you really wrestled with God and he gave you not just revelation on how to overcome that issue but power to process through it strategically. This is a concept I touch a lot on when I teach new coaches how to develop their first $1,000.00 coaching system.
This means. #1- You’re going to solve just ONE PROBLEM not three. Your not going to impress people with your extensive knowledge, you’re going to solve a practical problem you think you’re clients will gain from out of your experience. The beautiful thing about this is if you position this correctly, you can actually develop a product out of this later on and charge for it.
#2. It must be quick to the point and give them a result they are like WOW, that was so worth my time.
3# At the end, give them an invitation or call to action you want them to take into your sales funnel. I personally use my top header opt in for my foundational product and team, Bold Identity as it is the least amount of money they have to spend to connect with me IN PERSON. It’s also a team that has STELLAR results with helping people ditch limiting mindsets, build a consistent prayer life, fitness routine and clarify their vision for bigger goals.
6. Write one blog a week with compelling content. Two if you are really wanting to grow fast.
This helps you build trust with your audience and drives traffic faster. It also establishes your credibility as a reliable coach. If you can solve crucial problems that your visitors have, they will follow you on social media and look into the programs that you offer.
Put yourself on a minimal once a week publishing schedule as anything less will not drive traffic to your site successfully. If you want to grow your business quickly, this is crucial to you gaining momentum. Attach a nice graphic to the blog with the correct SEO friendly words and you have also placed your key words in to help your search rankings rise.
7. Have something going on monthly that will allow you to connect live with new customers.
Again, non-negotiable. I have grown my business on FREE monthly teleconferences for years and even though I have other marketing strategies in my back pocket now, this is the one that made me my first $25,000 coaching. Have a graphic made and attach it to the top of the right side bar where it grabs attention easily.
8.Clearly communicate who you are what you can help your clients do on your front page. I put this information in my right side bar with my office number for people to contact me. Here’s an example you can use.
I help ___________, build the _________ & ___________ they need to consistently __________ and then to ________________ others with this knowledge.
I am the (tell people what you used to do before you started coaching or accomplished ) and also a couple things you think might help people connect with WHO you are identity wise. Tell them what you do currently as a coach and then a little bio on your family or hobbies. End it with how they can contact you by phone, Skype or email.
9. Place a couple “How To” blogs in your right side bar or use this for additional email capture. This is a little bit more advanced but this is how you start really cranking up your list numbers. You can make this information an opt in that people have to access through giving you their email. You are going to have lots of free stuff on your site so this should be a really valuable article or content.
10. Place social media icons on front page for people to be able to connect with you on different platforms.
Depending on what kind of coaching you will do, for example, corporate trainers. That will be LinkedIn first. Facebook, you are going to build your practice through your friend network (Backyard BBQ). Twitter, you want to reach out internationally and to a varied audience (Rock concert) and Instagram and Pinterest which is picture driven. What is important is to be consistent on what you start off with. Hootsuite is a great base platform for scheduling these daily in one hour or less. Sandy Krawkoski at a Realchange has some great social media programs for pennies on the dollar. I have used several of them to grow and I love her no nonsense approach to building the kingdom!
I suggest blocking one hour a day to work on your website and remember, if you need help getting things into place, go to Fiverr.com and hire out for some of the overwhelming jobs!
I am taking the time to write this today because there are some of you who are desiring to live a deeper life with God and you’re not being able to motivate yourself to even get up and pray consistently because you are dealing with poverty mindsets in your prayer life.
You get up, you struggle to read the word, you ask God a question, you hear cricket like silence and then you wonder….”Does God really care about me? Does he care enough to give me some direction and speak clearly to me about specific problems in my life?
And my answer to you is yes! God your FATHER desires to speak to you clearly. I remember however, being just like you…taking time to read my Bible, not knowing if my prayers were heard and feeling very desperate and alone when I was finished because I was second guessing myself the whole time I was in prayer. I actually did not even go to God with the specific questions in the beginning because I was afraid of being disappointed if he didn’t speak. Like I wasn’t worth talking to.
Why? Because my earthly Father was an alcoholic. He had been abandoned by his biological mother and Father and adopted. This in addition to his adoptive parents then getting divorced, his adoptive father being an alcoholic, and no grasp of God’s kingdom anywhere in sight, it was truly a barren place for my Father. His father was very performance based and bought affection. Imagine being so poor in your emotional skills that you need to buy other people’s affirmation and affection.
As a man and Father my dad had a very limited ability to connect with anyone emotionally in a way that made him feel significant. When I reached out to my dad for any kind of genuine intimacy I was ignored or minimized. This created a very deep root of rejection and fear in my life and pain in the butt patterns that took me years to break out of.
This might have been the case for you. So, please understand, this is an actual spiritual curse that has to be broken with prayer and then you being WILLING to do the things that will help you recreate a new bold identity.
People who struggle with poverty or abandonment mindsets have real difficulty building loyal, long-term relationships, trusting people and leaders in their life whether in business or the church or even lovingthemselves. Why? Because they have been deprived emotionally over and over again and have little self-worth because of it. They EXPECT instability and have trouble believing things will get better.
It’s okay to say that. Shoot, I wish someone would have just had pointed out to me, Hey Becky, you’re not crazy and you don’t need 5 years of therapy, you just need prayer and to learn overcome a poverty spirit! (I thought I was depressed, I just didn’t have anyone show me how to vision cast!)
Really what we are talking about here is the process of moving from fatherlessness to being a spiritual son or daughter. I see more people under spiritual warfare that actually makes them feel like they are banana town crazy pants or that there is something wrong with them at the core. And here’s the good news. Your not broken. This mindset can overcome and success built in your life within one year. I have seen people’s minds be renewed in their identity in Christ over and over again. Now, you need a team to do it and a humble attitude but if your coachable, and you don’t quit. Which is why I always encourage people, if this is your issue, don’t just buy my material, invest in a TEAM along with it. In one year you will be a changed person, understanding how valuable you really are.
Here’s a couple way’s on how to overcome poverty mindsets in your prayer life.
Resist feelings of rejection when you feel overlooked. When other’s are promoted and you feel lack, then go to the Father and ask him for affirmation. Worship God until you touch his presence. I had to do this ALOT due to my own insecurity. It releases sonship into your life.
Get mentored by a mature leader in the faith and don’t Coach or Pastor hop. It takes faith, trust and TIME to grow a significant spiritual life and business. People who struggle with poverty mentalities do a lot of jumping around mainly because when people get to know the real mess they are dealing with and try and help them break out of it with accountability, they can’t deal with the authenticity level. GOD DISCIPLINES those he loves. That’s the mark of ADOPTION by God. If you don’t have discipleship or accountability you will sabotage your growth. You must come to a place where you risk people seeing that your human like all the rest of us.
When you cannot hear God, return to your BOLD identity. We are like sheep that wander off. If we are struggling sometimes it can be fear but mostly it’s because you are still in an old “poverty mindset” that is your old identity. Literally, out loud just acknowledge BOLDLY your new identity and then ask God to speak to you clearly in a way you understand. I always take authority over fear if I feel resistance in prayer then I speak the word.
Having predestinated us unto the adoption of children by Jesus Christ to himself, according to the good pleasure of his will, to the praise of the glory of his grace, wherein, he hath made us accepted in the beloved. Ephesians 1: 5-6
Most of the time Christians feel like it’s their own voice they are hearing and not God’s. So, read a portion of scripture, here’s a video on how to do that if you need help. Then write down what you THINK God is saying to you like a Father would talk to his daughter or son. WHO HE IS PLEASED WITH. Not angry, remember you are ACCEPTED and he is rejoicing that you and he are spending time together. He’s not frustrated with your lack of progress, not disappointed that you have sinned or failed repeatedly, he is THRILLED to see you and have you back with him so he can help you build SUCCESS in his kingdom. If you get a specific instruction, execute as quickly as possible. Don’t hold back out of fear of failure. If it’s a major life decision, look for instructions in the word, run your thoughts through a leader you respect and is biblically grounded and then test out your hearing abilities. I can tell you, you will make a lot fewer mistakes than you will experience success.
Can’t wait to see you HEARING God clearly and enjoying the affirmation that only God can bring!
On February’s FREE Training I am going to share with you how to pray and get results when you are deeply discouraged and under enormous spiritual warfare.
Here’s what I will be solving for you on this call on February 9, at 7:00 pm EST.
The real reason you can’t hear God during sorrow and how to change that quickly so that you stay focused on the results you are praying for.
How to get your deepest heart wounds healed in one hour a week for one month. I’m going to give you my practical strategies that I have used to forgive the deepest betrayals, disappointments and made me an overcomer for over thirty years.
What questions you’re going to ask God to answer so he can take the wheel:) and you have peace until things change. (I am also going to break down how to recognize spiritual warfare)
How to obey him in dark seasons and stand so you experience the fruit of your prayers! This is big one if you want to hold on long enough to see the circumstances change.
This call is FREE FOR 1 NIGHT ONLY. Then it will be turned into a paid product. I will take a couple questions after the call. If you cannot sign up that is because you are already on our list. You will receive access to the call when you sign up and if you are already part of our list, we will send out the info one and two days before the call!
Words of affirmation I believe are one of the greatest gifts we can give those we love. Christmas is a wonderful time of year to focus on the heart of the season which is beauty, child-like faith and sharing the good news with those you love.
From a scriptural point of view, the power of the spoken word is immeasurable. Words of affirmation, when done correctly, move people from a place of feeling superficially appreciated to experiencing deep value. Anyone who knows me personally understands I really don’t care too much for what I call “fluffing or champing”. It’s that stuff we say to people that comes across as flattery and frankly is un-sincere. It’s about external beauty, possessions and man pleasing.
However, when you really want to begin to change someone identity wise, you look for authentic talents, inner beauty and characteristics that you see in them that will bring them to a place of seeing themselves as God see’s them. Deeply valuable.
So, this Christmas or on birthday’s, consider writing words of affirmation to someone sharing with them what is about them that set’s them apart and makes them extra-ordinary to you. Here are a couple ways that you can help affirm them identity wise the right way.
Finish these sentences:
One of the things I appreciate most about being your mother, friend is…..
There is not one day that goes by that I don’t think…..
I feel like I won the lottery when I see you doing this for others….
When I think of a faithful friend, I think about how you do this….
Because of how you do this…, it makes me realize how blessed I am to have you in my life.
I feel so thankful and grateful about this part of you…..
I have the best memories of this time with you….
I constantly see you operate in this spiritual gifting or natural one and it amazes me….
The passion you have for this, just amazes me….
When I think of you, I see this picture…..
There are no rules to this and you don’t need to worry about being a poet or a writer. Here’s the truth. Your letter may be the one thing that this person holds onto and reads during times of discouragement and trials. It could be the conversation starter to a whole new relationship and beautiful season with someone you love. Now get started writing!
Spiritual warfare is a normal part of the tension that you receive from impacting people for Christ. The moment you decide that you want your life to matter from a kingdom perspective and the Lord to get the glory, you are going to experience resistance like you never had before. Being prepared in prayer is part of the price your going to pay for being an overcomer. I wanted to speak to you about this from a really practical part of view and begin by just sharing with you some examples of what you might have to deal with.
The first assignment is to disconnect you out of spiritual community at church and in the relationships that are supporting your maturity in Christ.
You will have to choose constantly to not get offended, overcome the feelings of rejection you will experience and resist responding to people in the flesh. You might not have clarity for your life purpose or vision or even be on survival mode. You will learn to forgive yourself and others and this phase will feel very wearing emotionally. You will struggle with feeling insignificant to God and others. You will be double-minded and insecure during this phase. It’s two steps forward, one step back.
Tip 1 for this level of spiritual warfare: Connecting into the local church and a small Bible study is going to be very effective for you in overcoming the tension. Satan’s primary objective is to separate you from anyone who can pray for your destiny, purpose and encourage you in your purpose towards that. On a personal level, make sure that you prioritize spending time with God in prayer and memorizing the word of God. In the beginning I wrote down scriptures on index cards and attempted to memorize them as best I could. I didn’t understand the Bible hardly at all. I just assumed it was the truth and God would explain it to me when I was ready. I had some of the most unbelievable things happen to me during this phase, it was scary at times how much opposition I got. Most of this is because you are literally being wrenched out of the enemy’s hand by processing the word of God into your spirit. Get ready for a fight, because your going to get one.
Pray this (Ephesians 3:17) Christ dwells in my heart by faith; and I have been rooted and grounded in love. I resist rejection, mediocrity and selfishness. I am a servant of the Lord. Memorize every scripture about authority and claim it over your life when you feel terror.
The second level of spiritual warfare is learning about spiritual authority and how to respond correctly during disagreements and uncomfortable tension. This is place where you begin to become an actual threat to Satan. You are now in a position to pray with power and become a TRUTH BEARER to others. You will be used to convict people’s heart to conform to Christ or have to push him away. This happens because you know the word of God, more of your identity and you haven’t been able to be uprooted through your own flesh because of offense. You are now a conduit for Lordship for other people following Christ. The tension here comes because you are experiencing rejection for the sake of Christ and getting delivered from people pleasing. This is a place where all true leaders have to go in order to be launched correctly.
Tip 2 for this level of spiritual warfare: At this level you are building spiritual relationships that are not just keeping you connected into the body but accountability that is going to protect and guard you as you advance. To be an overcomer in this phase you must invest the time to build and pray weekly with the people who will pivot you and protect you as you step into multiplication. You will have to get more transparent and receive more prayer for the places where you feel weak and tempted. Willingly. This phase is not about people prodding you into submission but about you willingly inviting the deeper discipleship of Christ into your life. You will be challenged to let go of traumas and wounds at a much deeper level. You become an overcomer in this phase by praying in agreement the word of God over your partners passions and exact purpose in Christ for who they are called to reach. You will still deal with doubt and unbelief but you will recognize it as that and be able to speak the word of God to it.
Third, you will experience even greater spiritual warfare as you now get ready to take your full position in Christ as a messenger and multiplier. Now the resistance comes because you’re called to impact through preaching, speaking, writing. The mechanisms that will lead to exponential multiplication. Your commission at this level is to subdue the whole earth (Gen 1:28) through your resurrection message. The story and the testimony that you have of the transformation Christ brought you. Often times much of the warfare is over the clarity, the confidence and the identity that you are going to reproduce in others. During this phase in my life, I experienced an identity theft for almost a million dollars and had every relationship I had went through the fire. Some made it, some didn’t but you don’t stop the mission assignment and quit on your calling. Within one year of moving through this warfare, I launched my Christian coaching business which now serves people internationally. I also got hit with a lot of physical infirmity during this phase and still do. The warfare comes to try and slow you down and dilute your message from being spoken boldly. You have to fight to keep hope for your dreams in this phase.
Pray this (Isaiah 54:17) No weapon formed against me shall prosper, every tongue which rises against me in judgment, I shall condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, And their righteousness is from Me.
Tip 3 For This Phase Of Spiritual Warfare: You will experience a lot of second-guessing in this phase of your ability to be successful. This will be compounded by how much you have to learn to get out there in a bigger way. If this is where you are, you must completely depend on the strength of the Lord and just claim your identity as a finisher. It’s all about him and who he is calling you to not your own abilities to communicate. In this phase you hopefully have surrounded yourself with other men and women who are called to the same commission and you absolutely do not back down. (You will have to fight through fuzziness, loneliness, lack of resources, temptation to take short cuts. You will also have to focus on writing and communicating in the middle of incredible warfare). The apostles were getting physically beaten during this point, had demonic infirmity assigned to them to keep them humble and experienced financial hardship daily. You must pray and just ask God for more grace to communicate consistently and boldly.
Pray this (Ephesians 6:12) For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. I command doors to open for me to speak and witness about Christ in my city and my nation.
The bottom line is serving Christ and influencing for him is going to bring spiritual warfare. We are to welcome that as an indication that we are actually doing something substantial in the kingdom not run from it. YOU are called to transform people for Christ through your message. There is no backing up!